I need help

1 minute ago, LoatharMDPhD said:

Far too much drink does not help. 2020 was the year of cirrhosis for me... there are more problems than answers in the bottom of a bottle... and im Ukrainian so Vodka is... a staple.. Too much drink makes the little devil on the shoulder louder, don't give him that respect...

Yes. Alcohol is literally a depressant, and it too will fuck with brain chemistry for the worse. There's no such thing as a happy and stable alcoholic.

15 hours ago, bobstremglav said:

Not really.

I think I caused more tears and stress by saying about this to mom and friends, maybe silence would be better.

Nah bro. I think talking about it was the right choice here. Shutting up probably would have just made things worse in the long run.

There's a long, windy, uneasy road to recovery.

The first steps are always the hardest.

It may feel selfish to break the peace, it may feel awful to upset someone you care for by telling them how you are but think for a moment, if talking about it inflicted such pain upon them then how much agony would they be going through if they found you dead?

You're important to them and they're important to you  please think about that and don't lose eachother. 

i tried kms before. but i forgot that i can swim

can't give you advice, can't say shit without being rude either. just try listen to whatever people above me been telling you :)

13 minutes ago, R1ck said:

i tried kiss my sister (first letters) before. but i forgot that i can swim

I still haven't figured out what this means

3 minutes ago, dasho said:

 

I still haven't figured out what this means

edited that. i guess the thread i posted got lost with the old server.

Important news

Probably some people noticed I wasn't here for whole month. Don't worry, that's because currently I'm going through asylym, and internet access here is shit.

They already found pills which makes me feel happier. I'll be home during next 1-2 weeks if nothing will change suddenly for worse.

3 minutes ago, bobstremglav said:

Important news

Probably some people noticed I wasn't here for whole month. Don't worry, that's because currently I'm going through asylym, and internet access here is shit.

They already found pills which makes me feel happier. I'll be home during next 1-2 weeks if nothing will change suddenly for worse.

Glad to finally hear back from you, it's a good thing you found medication that works for you. Things will get better, my friend, stay strong <3

i don't know if this applies to you. my parents taught me and my brother 3 things to fight depression:

• exercise regularly: the body actually produces certain chemicals when one exercises regularly to combat depression. forgot what the chemicals are called, though.
• have many friends: this is a vicious cycle. being lonely actually repels other people away. to break the loop, the lonely person should act like he/she has many friends, and avoid talking about self-problems, self-boasting etc to make new friends. only talk about your personal problems to close friends and family members. as time goes by, those new friends would become closer, and you could open up more to them. smile a lot and try to initiate conversations first, at least a "hi! how are you? you look fabulous today!" kind of speech. also once in while try giving out free food like homemade chocolate cookies etc to those that you regularly meet. the more you make other people happy, the happier you become, and the more friends you make.
• travel: at least once every 3 months. even to the next town for a few days is also fine but the trip must be away from home for several days.

hope these small tips help. and i hope all would eventually be well on your side. good luck! :)

3 hours ago, rita remton said:

i don't know if this applies to you. my parents taught me and my brother 3 things to fight depression:

• exercise regularly: the body actually produces certain chemicals when one exercises regularly to combat depression. forgot what the chemicals are called, though.
• have many friends: this is a vicious cycle. being lonely actually repels other people away. to break the loop, the lonely person should act like he/she has many friends, and avoid talking about self-problems, self-boasting etc to make new friends. only talk about your personal problems to close friends and family members. as time goes by, those new friends would become closer, and you could open up more to them. smile a lot and try to initiate conversations first, at least a "hi! how are you? you look fabulous today!" kind of speech. also once in while try giving out free food like homemade chocolate cookies etc to those that you regularly meet. the more you make other people happy, the happier you become, and the more friends you make.
• travel: at least once every 3 months. even to the next town for a few days is also fine but the trip must be away from home for several days.

hope these small tips help. and i hope all would eventually be well on your side. good luck! :)

Sorry, but I don't find these helpful.

-exercise: maybe the best tip of this bunch, won't argue with it, although gym memberships can be expensive

-have friends: this is an overwhelming piece of advice even i couldn't follow, and way easier said than done especially in the online age.

Edit: many shallow friends is not helpful. A few close, trusted friends that can give mutual support will go much further.

-travel: you are either rich or haven't actually followed this advice. Because I have a very stable job and even I can't afford to go and stay out of my home several days every three months. And in places like the US you are lucky to get that kind of holiday time.

I am not knocking you for trying to give advice but this particular set of advice seems less than helpful.

^ You don’t have to have a gym membership to work out. You don’t even need any equipment really either if money and/or space is tight. 

Try Gundam therapy...

https://www.ebay.ca/itm/275341793874

I was wondering about you. Glad to see progress. 

8 hours ago, Major Arlene said:

-exercise: maybe the best tip of this bunch, won't argue with it, although gym memberships can be expensive

walking, jogging, riding a bicycle, simple calisthenics, etc all do not require a gym membership.

8 hours ago, Major Arlene said:

-have friends: this is an overwhelming piece of advice even i couldn't follow, and way easier said than done especially in the online age.

Edit: many shallow friends is not helpful. A few close, trusted friends that can give mutual support will go much further.

may i know how you get those "close trusted friends" in the first place from totally zero friends? i also know a "trusted friend" that even after more than a decade of friendship, would then stab you in the back (we still maintain contact, but me being more careful on what info to share). shallow friends overtime would become closer if you spend more time with them building happy memories together like - going out for drinks, watch movies, small barbecue party at home, etc.

8 hours ago, Major Arlene said:

-travel: you are either rich or haven't actually followed this advice. Because I have a very stable job and even I can't afford to go and stay out of my home several days every three months. And in places like the US you are lucky to get that kind of holiday time.

lol! i'm sorry but no, my family is not rich (in fact, i still use my dad's 10 year old lappy). going camping or staying at cheap motels (bring bugspray and own bedsheets+pillows), eating at local cheap restaurants, etc is not going to cost much i guess (note: i travel with my parents in the family car). as for "holiday time", do people in the US work on saturdays and sundays too? my family usually travel during the weekends, sometimes we depart on friday evening and would be back home by sunday night.

to summarise, everyone have their own ways of dealing with stress/depression. so, i hope everyone become happier over time. good luck! :)

14 hours ago, Major Arlene said:

-have friends: this is an overwhelming piece of advice even i couldn't follow, and way easier said than done especially in the online age.

Edit: many shallow friends is not helpful. A few close, trusted friends that can give mutual support will go much further.

Certain hobbies facilitate meeting like-minded people.

I recently got into a social deduction game called Blood on the Clocktower in the last couple of years (linked a nicely-edited online playthrough video which I think was originally recorded during lockdown). It's like a face-to-face Among Us, similar to Werewolf for those who know it but friendlier and more inclusive. It's expensive to own, but requires a large number of people to play and there are local open groups all over the world who play it. I play once every two weeks in a pub in my local city and it's a great time. I've met loads of people I really enjoy being around. I'd consider many of them friends, and even if I only see them at the games I'm still socialising with them regularly.

Obviously not everyone is going to enjoy lying to a bunch of strangers (and being lied to) within the respectful context and rules of a game, but it's an example of something I started doing recently which has done wonders for my personal wellbeing. Doesn't cost me anything to play other than the drinks I buy at the bar. And some people just drink tap water all evening, so I guess it's free for them.

Another example: five(?) years ago a friend had recently broken up with her long-term partner and came to visit us. She was concerned that she didn't really do anything which helped her meet new people. I told her about the time I met a colleague of mine in a bar who was out with a social group which exists literally for the purpose of anyone who wants to meet people in a social environment.

It must take a bit of courage to go along to one of these for the first time, so again I know it's not for everyone, but she went along. We're all glad she did, because she's now happily married to someone she met with the social club she joined.

These are two specific scenarios that fit for me and my friend. There are many options out there that will fit other people better, but I guess you have to know where to look (and of course have the motivation to, which is arguably most of the problem when you're fighting depression).

On the travel front, yes it's impractical for many people to spend several days' worth of lodging, travel, and dining expenses to hang out in a town where they are a complete stranger. An alternative that could still add some variety and a sense of exploration to your routine is to take up something like geocaching or waymarking. They both have a low cost of entry these days (if you have a smartphone, you already have access to free apps for both as well as a GPS that is probably reliable in areas where you have network service at least; some phones have a 'true' GPS but your mileage may vary) and are likely to have points of interest near where you live. If not, you could also be the first to place a cache or log a waymarking site.

Not sure how relevant this is but while I was stressed over a lot of stuff the last month, one thing that did help me clear my head a bit that is on the travel front was to just go out.

No traveling to a different town or anything or spending days outside. Just going outside, walking around familiar places, window shopping books and eating some cheap-ass street food. That might also be a thing you can do.

Speaking of which I am actually planning to go out in an hour or so.

The US has the National Forest system (and many other countries have similar systems) where it's completely free and legal to setup a tent, campfire, and stay overnight. I would actually use the National Forest system as a "free motel" when travelling across the US. They are easy to find on google maps, and they often contain beautiful hiking trails and/or natural landmarks you don't normally see anywhere else.

Doing an overnight hiking / camping trip every 3-4 months into some isolated, beautiful outdoor place is how I deal with stress. Just one night of reading a book by the campfire into the night in the wilderness is powerful enough to solve any stress related problem I have ever had in life.

On 5/30/2023 at 2:27 PM, bobstremglav said:

Sorry for ruining peace of this community, but I don't know where to ask or where to search, I hope you can help. Knowing how friendly this community I already expect kind of answers, but I hope at least somebody can hint me something.

 

If you're sensitive to theme of suicide - leave topic right now.

 

  Hide contents

I want to kill myself. I tried to make rope tight on my neck using bare hands but it doesn't do anything and rope started to tear earlier than I felt anything good. I want to hang myself like usually it's done, but I afraid of incoming pain, my old and bad fear. How I can overcome? Or maybe there easier way, I heard that alcohol combined with medical drugs can do things. I have easy access to alcohol, I have money for it, but then it would be nice to know which kind of pill I should take to make death 100% possible. We have small storage of various medical stuff, maybe there I can find something.

I tried to hang myself slightly, and I can feel it will be painful, but at least it will work for sure. I couldn't breathe and I think I even felt how my brain wasn't getting oxygen. Maybe alcohol itself will be enough to not feel much of pain? I know I want to die, but idea of pain turns me into wussy.

My house also doesn't has many things which I can use to hang to. There's one great stick between walls, but it's thin and I afraid my weight will break it. There's small forest and abandoned building nearby, there can be stuff, but bringing chair to them can raise some questions from people, it's daylight, and abandoned building as I saw doesn't has many furniture left.

 

Don’t kill yourself. Maybe spend time with other people. Make a friend. Have some family time. Play some games. Get a cat or a dog. Get any pet. Just never resort to suicide as an option.

*Reads title*

Interesting, I wonder...

*Reads thread*

SWEET MOTHER OF AKATOSH. I beg of you, please don't do it. You have to be extremely deranged if you think anyone is willing to help you kill yourself. There's absolutely zero reason for you to do this. Please talk to your parents, friends, anyone, or call a suicide hotline in whereever you live. It's never too late. As someone who never, ever wanted to die because of fear of death, I guarantee it's better to live than to throw away your own life.

As somebody who is tough minded and has dealt with depression growing up, It's not worth taking your own life.

For me I've dealt with some personal struggles like controlling my anger issues, and on top of that I was dealing with the school system at the time failing me and mistreating me throughout the years. Plus my internet presence didn't do wonders either, and I pretty much made an ass of myself on various communities as a teen and I ended up becoming more anti-social at 2016 and only got out of it slowly between 2019 and 2020.

What prevents me from having thoughts of doing illegal drugs or suicide, etc is asking myself this.. I still have friends right? (even a few friends count) What games have you tried or even completed? What hobbies do you love? and so forth.

It's all about finding a healthy mindset. For me I have a friend group I chat around almost everyday, a desire to make content for YouTube, the idea of trying new things casually like art and music, and even the want to finally learn to solder (I see the benefits because I am a vintage computing enthusiast)

If you are ever in need to talk or befriend somebody, feel free to hit me up.

I don't want to sound like an edgy shit, but I firmly believe that nobody should be forced to live a life of sorrow and pain, especially at the request of others (nobody will ever understand this), but i can feel that just as easy as it is for me to love and appreciate everything, can be swung to make me hate and detest life, it's an odd feeling. above or below the bullshit? is there any reason to go on? maybe everybody would be better without you? it runs through your head like a race horse on crack. To make sense of it all and to justify your existence or the existence of anything is a task fit for no-one, don't even try. as much as I've thought about it I do not (and can not) fully understand what happens when you finally die, do you live some sort of second life? a flash before your eyes? what if you're living through one right now? this is the only thing stopping me, that, my love, and skateboarding i guess. sometimes it feels like the only thing you can do besides checking yourself out is distract yourself with hobbies, drugs, and entertainment, and even that gets boring after a while. sometimes it's better to feel sad than to not feel at all. So for any of you to think about, would your family/friends rather you disrupt the common "vibe"? or find your body?